I R WRITER

R.I.P. WHITNEY HOUSTON

2012-02-12T10:49:00.003Z

Whenever there is a death of a celebrity who really kind of mattered -in the sense that there wasn’t any bullshit surrounding the profession: She was famous because she was a singer and she wasn’t just ANY singer, she was someone who set a standard- I can’t help but be touched by it.

But my feelings of involvement and upset-ness in their death always makes me aware of the fact that she was not the only person to die yesterday, that there are children dying everyday. I question how much energy I should put into mourning the artist when I can be so passive about that through my day to day life. Obviously I acknowledge that poverty like that exists but one person dies and there is an uproar, hundreds of people die because of lack of water and food and we almost accept it as the norm.

The difference obviously is that even though Whitney was a stranger to us in the definition of the word, she actually wasn’t. Celebrity has changed so much since society first became fascinated by other talented human beings. We are privy to so much information about them, even if it is knowledge they would rather us not know about, the more info we get the less of a stranger they become, you end up feeling as if you do know them. Not to mention her awesome talent as well that is surely a factor in what draws a lot of people to her. We don’t know her really but through her music and seeing the ins and outs of her life you end up having this odd link.

And still I wish I would get as worked up about the thousands of unwarranted deaths that happen weekly.

...HIZZONT SHE LORVLEE

2012-02-09T21:43:00.001Z

Timberland and Missy

2012-02-07T23:22:00.012Z

Are both releasing albums in June this year, Timberland is quoted as saying that the aim is to release their videos and singles at the same to "do it as a movement" ^_____^

I R very excite for this. Last year I basically ignored everything that was released music wise, mainstream music doesn't have to be boring but in my opinion it all took a steady decline in 2011. Overall it was either really braindead (see Katy Perry, Nicki Minaj and their companyons), or really 'soulful' 'good' music (see Adele and Jessie J, both of which took a train in from snoozeville and proceeded to brainwash the masses). It was also the year mainstream music abused my beloved Dance genre, obviously there were a few anomalies here and there but ultimately they didn't get much chart love.

EN EE WAY. It is only February and already i've been impressed with what the music industry wants to offer me and now this new info is the icing on top of the cherry on top of the icing on top of the cake. It'll be cool to have some interesting stuff in the charts again, do you remember when Miss Demeanor and Timbo were running thangs? Let me remind you.

*Drools*

I'll stop here before I do their whole discography, but you get the picture. Can they top this?

Imma read dat bitch.

2012-02-06T12:09:00.000Z

Put the webcam down.

2012-01-28T16:18:00.018Z

Every now and again on YouTube you have a kind of twilight zone moment in which one minute you are YouTubing gospel songs and next thing you're watching a fat girl slap her stomach fat together. (If you're me it happens in the opposite direction, fat girls on YouTube FTW)

Here is my journey, one minute you are watching Jamie Oliver put meat into a washing machine to mimic the way Mc Donalds create 'Pink Slime' for their burgers.

Then you're watching an Australian create a home made big mac, then you start watching how chicken nuggets are made (in a horrendous manner). Then you Stumble across a cool Japanese pool. Then you click the link that says 'COKE + PORK = WORMS'. Then you end up watching a video which is just one picture of a character from Spongebob Squarepants.

Then

Then you watch the video that shows you what kissing looks like from inside of the mouth. Funnily enough this where it starts to go wrong.

So then you see videos at the side showing you how to kiss 'properly' and you think cool, tips. One video in and you realise there are no tips to be had. There are a kagillion 'How to kiss videos' on YouTube and in true YouTube fashion NONE of them are helpful. In this high-tech day & age you would assume any inquisitive youth wanting to learn how to kiss like the people on TV would have an array of shit to learn from. But still the best place to practice kissing is probably your pillow or your hand. Or a mirror. (Psschh, what, who does that? I mean DID that. Not me)

Then you see this video:

Then this x__x :

Then This -____-:

Then this:

Then this and this it what took the biscuit & drove me to document. This is exactly the kind of mess that I knew would happen:

Why the hell would anyone think this shit is appropriate. I can just about understand the boyfriend tag because YouTube beauty bloggers are well known narcissists and this is what they do. Plus YouTube tags are something that have been around for a while.

But setting a camera up to document you both kissing and hugging each other for a non-fetish website is WEIRD. It is very WEIRD. Crying into a webcam for YouTube because your mummy and daddy won't let you date your super cool older boyfriend is WEIRD. And filming your boyfriend ask you out again is WEIRD, with that baby voice that makes my eyeballs itch.

IT'S NOT OK. I know i'm not the best person to write about this because for me my personal life is so personal, a part of me would love to put all my favorite people in a cubicle with air holes so they can only be mine and it's none of your business what they did today.

Even to the extent where on twitter I see people talking about their partners every 5 seconds, obviously there is nothing wrong with talking about someone you love, when you love someone they generally take up a lot of your thoughts. But i'm talking about the ones who act like he inhales oxygen for them, every other minute he has to be mentioned or the ones who feel the need to make an announcement every time he does something to their vagina's. It makes me do O_o, REALLY? No one needs to KNOW! Not even in a prudish manner, to me it's as if these people can't have something be real to them unless everyone else knows about it.

'This is my boyfriend we do this together, he exists guys really and he loves me this is why he does these things that you all need to know about'

NO!

NO1CURR! On the interwebz about only a handful of people are actually your FRIENDS. Remember that and grow some BALLS.

ONE ROOM, THREE GLOBAL NAMES

2012-01-26T13:57:00.002Z

For three supercalifragilisticexpialidocious week’s crane.tv are exhibiting a selection of their favourite artists and designers. Being one of the leading digital video-magazines for contemporary culture, Crane.tv pride themselves on providing innovative content for the masses. With the exhibition in its second week IDOL popped down to see what the artist Kate MccGwire had to offer.

With this exhibition crane.tv intend to curate a selection of well-known creatives in order to showcase a new creative discipline with each new week. The three-week exhibition begins with Sir Terence Conran, Kate MccGwire takes the helm during the second week and Matt Pyke will exhibit his work in the final week.

Kate MccGwire chose to display an array of personal artefacts that she has amassed throughout the years. Each object in some way inspired previous works and continues to influence her art. We were provided with a sheet of paper explaining the use and origins of the objects that were featured. The interesting collection included a wide and varied selection, from her Grandmothers wedding dress (1925), to a Prosthetic eye (1940) each piece was perfectly explained, helping to provide a coherent link between all of them.

Alongside the three artists there is also a rolling programme of live events, workshops and talks by both established and emerging talent. By providing the creatives with a platform to present random pieces personal to them, crane.tv hopes to give viewers an exclusive look into their favourite artists world.

ONE ROOM, THREE GLOBAL NAMES

9th-29th January 2012

For more information visit

www.crane.tv

Photos Courtesy of: Crane.tv/Paul Rappaport

What i've been listening to recently

2012-01-26T13:48:00.004Z

CLEAROUT

2012-01-26T13:07:00.012Z

Definitely one for le street wear lovers.

Y'ello folks

2012-01-22T21:55:00.004Z

A little bit of a serious one here. Recently the interwebz was all a-buzz with news about the two proposed bills: SOPA and PIPA. It was like a David and Goliath story and in the end we all felt like david. Take THAT government.

Unfortunately a bill even more horrendous, in terms of our human rights and luxuriousness of the internet, has been electric sliding right underneath our noses. One that is due to be signed next week. It doesn't have the hype of wikipedia and tumblr behind it but it's not any less important, in fact it's a lot scarier and it really needs to be stopped. Here is a video that explains the situation very well:

We can't let shit like this go through, they shouldn't have the right to be able to monitor everything we do. It all comes down to money and control and possibly even more sinister crap that we won't go into today Please don't let it slide.

Here are a few petitions that you can sign:

http://epetitions.direct.gov.uk/petitions/20685

http://www.petitiononline.com/stopacta/petition.html

Also post the petitions to your Facebook's and tweet about it A LOT it needs to trend.

The Drylist

2012-01-22T21:50:00.003Z

Just incase you were wondering. Top 10.

Chinos
Iggy Azalea
Adele
ACTA : http://epetitions.direct.gov.uk/petitions/20685
Fashion Blogs
Internships ("What do you MEAN you can't work 6 months unpaid?")
Transport for London
The Olympics
Boris Johnson
Tattoos and Piercings

Give me

2011-12-24T14:24:00.004Z

Give me by cptjade featuring faux leather skinny pants

I promise

2011-12-19T23:34:00.009Z

That this blog isn't turning into just about music I like and my clothes and general shit that only interests me. I save that for my xanga. Jors kiddin. I save it for my tumblr. Slang your cliches at me, I don't curr. But I have been so lazy, thats a lie. I've been doing STUFF! And so at the end of the day, to sit down and right, can I even spell write? I haven't wanted to do it. But i've been thinking and I have some stuff to write about. Like Homeless people, and time dimensions and chinos.

I'm just trying to wet your... taste buds with my updates of music I like because I like your eyeballs. And I want to keep 'em here but I know I don't deserve it really. If this blog was a strip show all you would be seeing so far is my leg in a high heel peeking from a curtain. And it's even still got the stocking on. And the stocking isn't connected properly to le suspendah belt so it's sagging at the knee. But trust me it's going to get sexy. I'm putting on my lipstick. However for now...

YOU WILL HINJOY THIS:

Wild Life @ StolenSpace

2011-12-12T15:15:00.000Z

CLICK HURR

You will enjoy this

2011-12-12T15:09:00.000Z

Wild Life

2011-12-03T22:48:00.003Z

Went to the preview for this exhibition on thurs and le write up will be on idolmagazine.co.uk soon.

Outfit - The spaz edition

2011-12-03T22:30:00.005Z

....Still not pro with thee old self-timer business.

(My head is like that in the last pic because I thought that my head wasn't in the picture.... sexbomb)

You will enjoy this

2011-12-02T23:20:00.001Z

Loose lips sink ships (It's a trip)

2011-12-01T13:37:00.005Z

Hello heathens.

I'm exciteed, but I made the decision this month to not flap my gums about things until they are more so set in stone. So many times i've been bursting at the seams with some good news only for tumbleweed to prevail later. I know that's life, but i'm trying a new tactic this time. But. You know hopefully it goes through!

I leave you with this bossy ass chuneage. I was introduced to WildCookie by my aunt and cousin a few weeks ago. It's a soulful, smooth album. And it is all about hard drugs. Apart from this song. Unless it's just a really deep metaphor about being high that I don't understand.

aM i PrEtTy NoW?

2011-11-26T23:00:00.002Z

Love me.

Time for some Rick Astley eyebrow

2011-11-22T23:22:00.002Z

The other day...

2011-11-19T12:23:00.008Z

My boss gave me photo shop elements.

At A-level I had to learn how to use photoshop and I was quite good at it, but 6 years on, that ship has sailed. I initially had a little dabble at it and after playing with a gradient tool and trying to use the paint bucket... I realised I am going to need some tutoring. Well this morn I got a mini tutorial from my loserface and this is what he did:

So what you must all do now, is respect my authoritah and my wrists. I asked for the head to be larger than the body as it made me think of one of my fav music vids, hegzibit A:

You will enjoy this

2011-11-19T11:35:00.006Z

Quarter Life Crisis.

2011-11-15T00:32:00.007Z

What. Am. I. Doing.

What. Are. YOU. doing?

A few years ago I was sleeping on a mattress in my brothers' room because I was in between switching rooms in the house so my old/current room was a shit hole and the room I was due to move in to was covered in Newspaper. At the time my mum and siblings were living in Brunei and my dad doesn't mind about things like that so I was free to be a hobo in my own home.

I started to write a book detailing the life of a recently graduated girl who was in the middle of a shit internship and had grand GRAND ideas of doing more. I got to the part where she quit her internship with the intention of inventing some new form of social media before she had a quarter life crisis. And died.

Slightly dramatic, I started writing it while I was in my final year of university so it's funny how I’ve indirectly predicted my current situation. Before I get the positivity brigade swinging from my balls let I n I vent.

I don't know if you've noticed but every fucking person is the next big thing? Everyone's horizon is bright. If you don't have that frame of mind then get a twitter, you'll log on and at any given time someone is making #bigmovements someone just had an AMAZING MEETING, someone has just "created magic" with someone in the studio. Another is telling the year 2012 to get ready to bite the pillows because it is THEIR time. Anyway.

I don't know if I’m just surrounded by soaring Eagles which would be good or if everyone is just a delusional clipped wing chicken. But it's getting harder to tell the difference.

It is... 11 in the night and I had the idea to hassle all the places I have done work experience, for vacancies I went through my CV to get names and started to think A) I NEED MOAR! B) What is the FUCKING point?? How many other people are trying to get the same shit right now, what do I have to offer that is any different? And what's to say I’m any good ANYWAY.

I love writing so much, I love reading, I love paper, I love notebooks, I will caress some stationary until I get the paper cuts but if I had followed through with my Psychology degree would I be in a different situation right now.

All of us are getting told the moon in the 4th dimension is our limit; I am having a crisis of faith. I have friends who are saving up for mortgages and awaiting kids and marriage, while I do internships with recently graduated NeWbZ. On the flipside what's the point in a mortgage, it is not even a decent investment anymore but we're all so intent on carrying on in the same way our parents did even though everything about the economy they grew up in has changed compared to what we now have. The more I apply to jobs that I could do with my eyes closed and the more replies I get that favour a fancy long winded fart (equipped with treble clef and bass) combined with the more FREQUENT reply I get from fancy long winded farts COUSIN –Tumbleweed.

I just think (you have to really).

I am clearly inside something and what's more I don't think I am the only one inside of it. I'm 23 trying so hard to fit the mould that is expected of me, but these bitches don't want me.

I'm starting to view my coveted job working for a magazine as a pair of handcuffs. These handcuffs will connect me to a train calling at all stations to death via mortgage, husband, big litre car and keedz.

THEN I THINK OF ground-breaking things that have happened before me and I don't feel like they could possibly have been on the same route as me and have created that shit. I think a lot of us are living like clipped wing chickens meanwhile being fed an image back of ourselves to validate our lifestyles to make us feel like eagles.

I met up with a friend for drinks last week who told me Leonardo di Vinci conceptualised a helicopter and a computer and so much more at a time when those things would be unfathomable. Underneath one of his many ideas he apparently wrote something along the lines of "For this to work a hard type of material will need to have been invented" and he was describing plastic how many years before we even had it. I'm not saying we're all Leonardo di Vinci's but even if we all do have that potential, living the way we are right now we cannot even be half way to being anything like that. His thought processes must have been mind -blowing and here I am waiting for my handcuffs so I can begin my zombie walk through life. The zombie walk probably isn’t even that unenjoyable.

But while the zombie walk is not being handed to me on a platter as it was for previous generations, I feel like I should take the opportunity to do an unbeaten path. That's probably a flaw in itself because the world is not made to be Leonardo di Vinci anymore. More like Katie Price.

I'm just letting my Debbie downer breathe tonight.

H&M X VERSACE

2011-11-11T23:42:00.004Z

Excuse me while I go and queue up on regent st now. If you also want to pick something up ...then go to the H&M in Bromley where it will drop on the 17th ....and leave I n I to handle bidnizz.

You will enjoy this

2011-11-11T23:38:00.004Z

Hip Hop like this just grabs my heart through my ribcage and pulverises it in the nicest way possible. I wish I could have been around to experience rap through the 90's, not to sound all: "omgsh things are AlwAyz BetTer in teh PasT!!" but you have to admit it was the genres glory days.

Christmas

2011-11-03T02:08:00.002Z

I watched Anuvahood on Monday

2011-11-03T02:00:00.003Z

I was going to post the official video but it was too much tom foolery. It's the chorus that gets me.

Regarding the movie.... PAUSE.

G to the IIIII, slyyyyyy, look into my eyee

2011-10-29T23:09:00.006+01:00

....Who used to watch Channel U when it used to be called Channel U.... Yeah..me...neither.

But imagine if you did, the experience would have been amazing/hilarious. From the bootleg videos to the shit story lines. It's where my burning dislike for NDubz first blossomed. I mean. Would have blossomed.

Youtube is harboring a lot of videos on that site of theirs, uploaded by people who post comments like "This is when grime was GRIME." "Fuck Chipmunk". I was planning on posting a few videos from Le past for old times sake but I realised there are too many gems! So I'll be doing it in 2 segments or 3, or 4 ....O____O. It's the nostalgia probably but I look back on these videos so fondly. Even though now I properly listen to the lyrics the majority get intense sideye.

Obviously I have to begin with a song from south. As much as I used to watch Channel U with a superior attitude (even if I liked the song) this song I can't deny, I was ever. so. slightly. a tiny. little bit. proud of! Forgive meh! I was 16!

The first time I saw the above video... two things stood out for me 2:04 the girl jigging up in her church dress and THEN the girl at 2:12 in the crop top. Lmao good times.

Dragon Ball Z

2011-10-29T22:43:00.004+01:00

I have wished I had made this for the longest time.

On a side note, if anyone knows where to get legit copies of the Dragon Ball Z series let me know. I don't want to stream it online I want hard copies please!!!

Chill out grandma

2011-10-29T21:41:00.007+01:00

Anyone who has a visible tattoo (regardless of whether it's a huge piece on your neck, to maybe ... the tiniest little tattoo on your wrist) will have been asked at least once "what about when you want to get a job?" "What about when you get married?" ...this was probably asked by a grandparent or another elder. Personally I think a heavily tattooed laydee in an extravagant white dress is one of the sexiest things ever but my Jamaican grandparents would BEG to differ, anyway that is neither hurr nor thurr. So now, not only is there the argument of laser surgery to throw back in their faces with polite gusto, enter: make-up brand Dermablend. In the video below watch them cover up the 'Zombie Boy' who is just all kinds of hot to me. I find it fascinating that his face is a mask, if I met him I would need to stare at him for a while. Just like I like to do when I see sexy homosapiens. The vid is cool, seeing him with the foundation on looking like 'everyone else'.

HOWEVar.

I think the whole idea of him being some kind of 'freak' is a little dated, the campaign is called 'Beyond the cover' but it's 2011 are we all still really THAT taken aback by ink? He's not the only person in the world tattooed head to toe. Certain tribes have been doing it for decades and over here in le western world it's not really the most groundbreaking thing anymore is it? I think we can admire that the work he has had done on his body is especially amazing but not much more than that.

TRICK DADDY

2011-10-25T23:41:00.000+01:00

Love in your mums place

2011-10-25T23:07:00.004+01:00

A part of me thinks yay Calvin Harris, yay LOVE. I can get down to this. But then the video gets my balls all in a bunch. It looks like series one of skins squinched into 4 mins. I didn't like skins because I didn't believe them. Likewise I don't believe Rihanna in this video or song. It's so artificial it also grates me that I know a lot of people are watching the video and going "Yay I want this love this is so REAL and HARDCORE" or "THIS IS HOW I FEEL ABOUT MY RELATIONSHIP, OmGsH I'M SO IN LOVE"

I hate. Stuff. Like. That. The Daria in me cannot allow it.

It is so typical of this current fast food generation, don't even get me started on the talking intro. You're not deep bish.

If you truely wanna get sexy and lovey dovey avec moi you're going to have to have shit like this in your arsenal:

(But wait, Rihanna is rude. She knows the boy looks like her ex)

Boss Behaviour 2011

2011-10-25T22:33:00.002+01:00

UNCLE TERRY

2011-10-25T14:39:00.003+01:00

Just when you thought he couldn't get anymore pervier.

Bucie - Get Over It

2011-10-23T16:25:00.006+01:00

Went to Viva la house yesterday ....Gucci belt, chino trouser, Nike blazer galore! Lol but no amount of sheep behaviour could taint the music and good vibes. Liked this one I heard, and obviously, Black Coffee was too much on the decks. Check out THIS post I did on him earlier in the year for some of his tracks. This music is dangerous, you will dance till your toes bleed internally. Esther knows. ("Who's Esther" the crowd whispered to themselves, "your mum" Jade replied with fervor)

Nails done, hair done everything deeeed.

2011-10-15T00:50:00.007+01:00

But minus the nails. I got my roots re-dyed on wednesday as the black was starting to show. I also had to basically cut a kagillion inches off of my hurr. Exageration, but basically I have been colouring my hair for years now, this combined with being lazy with doing treatments and also not letting my aunt cut my split ends for nearly a year, means that this Wednesday when I went to get my hair done I basically had a halo of split ends around my head. I realised I had to go for the chop. My hair is natural and used to be like a mane which made me feel like a Lion... well not no mores! lol sarry. abowt. THART. Oh well. "Haaaair grows" (throw back Sabrina le Teenage Witch style) so things like this don't really get to me. You live and you learn. And you get a good condtitioner.

In le past

In le present

Versahsheh for H&M

2011-10-14T11:45:00.005+01:00

...Well hallo there.

For more pictures visit: YIN&YANG

...Hiii Rih-aah-nah

2011-10-13T13:16:00.004+01:00

This Cypher was sick. But how sick was le instrumental???

Black History Month

2011-10-11T13:35:00.005+01:00

Yep it is October, yes it is black history month. Maybe you didnt even realise, so far all we've had is the MOBO's. Something which, we really should not even get into right now. All I will say is Jason Derulo O__O... and muhsuckin Jessie J. So basically so far this month gets a big fat "WHUTTT??"

I'm hoping to get to a few events before the month is over, check out http://www.black-history-month.co.uk/ for some stuff to get into before the month is up.

To be honest as a black person or if you're mixed race, finding out about your own history is something that for the most part you have to do yourself. No one is really going to force feed this stuff to you. You can use this month as a way to put a bigger spotlight on it BUT it'll take more than a month to recover. PLUS it's hextra interesting finding out about your past, you'll be suprised by some of things you learn, realising that some of things that you thought were truths really are not.

FATBOY SLIM

2011-10-08T23:34:00.001+01:00

Another epic music video. This doesn't have the peter pan part where he is flying but this was the best quality vid I could find that actually allowed embedding. Enjoy some old man dancing. The kick ball changes are flah.

TL MUHSUCKIN C

2011-10-07T17:21:00.006+01:00

I always wanted to be in this music video, especially at the end. It's so flipping smooth, the silk PJ's, the SLOW MOTION WINES, the hot guy on the trumpet, the WIND machines. Just sexy.

Bugsy Chilli

SPAZ

2011-10-07T16:39:00.001+01:00

Good. LAWD.

2011-10-05T22:10:00.002+01:00

Ms Dynamite

2011-09-22T14:24:00.001+01:00

A nice one for my tired Thursday

EMERPUS

2011-09-22T13:35:00.006+01:00

What I wore to le supreme after party for the store opening in London. Was a good night! The venue wasn't big enough for the amount of people who came though so it was quite the sweatbox. Everyone had a good time though and then when Ghostface KILLAAAAH came on... larrrdamercy. Twas tres hyped. I'll post more pics later and perhaps do story time...or will I.

Crepe City

2011-09-20T12:44:00.010+01:00

On sunday I went down to Crepe City to review it for IDOL. I initially walked in tired-der than a mofo and feeling like Daria. It had been my sisters 21st party the day before and I got to bed around 3am. "ooh jade 3am, hardcore" Yeah but the day before THAT I had stayed up till about 4am watching earth wind and fire videos LIKE A DUNCEBREED. So during the day of the party I was all kinds of fucked.

Anyway I was meant to meet another girl there who works for IDOL as she would be taking le pictures but she was late because she had to wait for her friend so I walked in anyway to have a look.

...Whole heap of Chris Browns, Odd Futures, and Kreayshawns with a side of that Rita Ora girl. At first I was just thinking "Dry. Like". That combined with how hungry/tired I was and how packed out IT was, I basically walked around once, barely looking at anything and then walked back out.

But I realised I needed to grow some streetwear bawls and get atleast a little something of a story out of this so I went back, the girl and her friend were there by then and the fact that she was there, meant I had to perk up and stop acting like a zombie anyway.

So I started to speak to the stall owners, one man was getting rid of his things as he was "40 odd and needed to kind of stop all of this now" aw. Others were just coming down to see how much they could make out of their old hexscloosive garms. There was also actual shops there and independent designers using it as a way to drum up some PR and sell shit in le process.

After properly looking around I actually started to enjoy it and the vibes (this was also probably due to eating a banana too). I had been tweeting about my experience and one of my friends Hannah decided to swang by which meant that the tomfoolery behaviour began and in the last hour Miss Kharise also stopped by too after closing up her stall at spitalfields market. Equaling tomfoolery x3.

So a good time was had by all. Aside from putting on a really good trainers festival, Crepe City also serves as a way to dispel the notion that all streetwear people are dicks. Awl hail le uniting creps.

I'll post the official pictures that we took (she took) once I have them.

...Hello

2011-09-19T12:42:00.003+01:00

WINTER COAT!

Earth muhsuckin Wind.... and Fire

2011-09-17T19:05:00.002+01:00

Their vids are always epic, spandexy with really REALLY BAD special effects. They're just all good juicy kinds of trippy. One day when I have a huge mansion i'll put these up on my mahoosive projector screen thingy and smoke something with an old Snoop Dogg.

The rest do not have official music videos but there are loads of vids on Youtube of them performing it live, which are amazing but not completely full length like the ones below are.

This last one you can't listen to straight away, you need to prepare the eardrums first.

James muhsuckin Brown

2011-09-17T02:21:00.007+01:00

Imagine you made this song.

When I was in the middle of my Psychology degree we learnt about a theory by a psychologist called Abraham Maslow. It was called 'Maslow's hierarchy of needs'. To cut a long story short, it's best displayed as a pyramid that begins at the bottom with our basic needs. As we work our way up the pyramid we acquire more and more ... shit. Once you get to the top it means you have met all of the needs necessary to attain something called self actualisation which basically means you're SUPAHBAD. However I think I could skip all that, as long as I one day can create a song on SOTCH LEVELS. I'll leave you an image of the pyramid (everyday illuminati getting involved):

Also if you can listen to the song without doing the stank lip you are a stronger man than I. You should research the theory, a lot of people nowadays are into le secret and positive thinking and about being amazing and being Beyonce (but who's going to sweep the streets?). It's a really interesting theory that a lot of people will like, considering the current climate.

MEGALODON

2011-09-17T01:55:00.007+01:00

Managed to drop Megalodon into conversation this evening, i'm going to do a post on it so you can truly understand it's epicness. But for now here is a pic which helps to show you how big that shit was.

It was basically a whale, that WANTED to eat you just because it's instinct said so. Unlike a shark of today there could never, ever have been a heart-warming story involving a sexy surfer dude fighting a shark off of his sexy leg and saving himself from amputation. This beauty would not even have to chew before swallowing. If you're lucky it will be a cocky Megalodon who will take pity on you knowing that it usually tackles blue whales for breakfast and instead, swims past you flicking it's (Blonde) hair.

Hollywood Swinging

2011-09-17T01:47:00.002+01:00

Currently...

2011-09-15T21:44:00.007+01:00

Perusing fashion blogs, doing opened mouth stare and thinking "For why can't I be you?" with your chanel bag and J crew socks and miu miu shoes ect ect. And then I look at the 5 other tabs I have open. They are all currently about Megalodon, well four are, one is a youtube vid called "Carl Sagan - Pale Blue dot (living like on di h'edge). Even though Megalodon sounds like a Digimon character, it is actually an extinct mahoosive shark that i've just found out about and i'm kind of foaming at the mouth about it because I have an obsession with big things coupled with the fact that it's from the sea, it basically ticks all my boxes that need to be ticked. I'm going to do a post about it.

ANYWAY

"Y R I NOT YOU?" ..Because you spend evenings in bed, with a disney princess quilt researching sea creatures. THATS why.

P.S. Why can they all fucking bake really well. Fuck your cupcakes and homemade dishes. (pleasebemyfriend)

Daydream, I fell asleep amid the flowers

2011-09-15T18:06:00.012+01:00

I spent the best part of today daydreaming about breaking my phone into tiny little pieces (or maybe just switching it off) and then leaving the country without telling a soul where I was going, maybe going off grid somewhere. Or just to a beach, I don't know. But AWAY. Some pretty destinatons for your ugly eyes and a dreamy song to go with them:

The pic above is the best hotel i've ever been to, it's in Brunei and I miss it.

I'm always...

2011-09-09T01:25:00.003+01:00

telling the Isley Brothers they should never have written this song about me, i'm just too modest for things like that.

I need to get this song on my phone and make it my alarm. Talk about a fitting theme tune.

Sorry for lack of posts

2011-09-04T13:11:00.009+01:00

I'm a lazy bum with a lazy bum who gets distracted and bored too easily. What blogspot needs to do is get rid of their log in page and just log me in automatically whenever I get on their page. Because they're psychic. Anywho it's that time of the month when your hot water bottle becomes your bestfriend, so i'm lolling around in bed doing online window shopping with a death stare.

I haven't actually been shopping in months and i'm feeling it. So if I could buy out the bar everywurr in the world, here is what I would be getting drunk on.

Hello

2011-09-04T12:49:00.004+01:00

I'm baaaaack. With a brand spanking new LAPTOP!

When Esther came to visit me at werk

2011-08-16T23:58:00.004+01:00

Esther took these pictures on that instagram thingy you iPhone users have... us HTC users have better things to do, rather than pretending that we're in the olden days with a tinted picture. *snooty sniff*

Something I wrote about the riots for IDOL

2011-08-16T23:13:00.000+01:00

Last week Thursday a man named Mark Duggan was shot and killed by three undercover police officers during a Trident operation. The anarchy that has since ensued on our ‘civilized’ country has opened everyone’s eyes to how quickly we break our social norms given the right environment and also how fragile the bonds are that tie us to our knowledge of right from wrong.

The root of the mayhem can be traced back to the three undercover police men, who unfortunately, executed their operation very badly. Imagine if they had not shot to kill and only disarmed Mark? It is unlikely that the following would have unfolded.

The initial story that was reported by the media stated that Duggan was armed and fired at police, thus resulting in the police returning fire and fatally shooting Duggan. To further cement this story we were also told that the initial shot from Mark Duggan would have actually killed one of the police officers had it not been for the police officer’s radio where the bullet was lodged.

This was one of the first mistakes the police made. Witnesses at the scene and friends and family of Mark insisted he did not have a gun and could not have fired at the police. This would mean he was unlawfully killed and the media were reporting a lie.

The second mistake by the MET was their lack of urgency when it came to speaking to the family. It took the police one and a half days to inform the family of why he was killed. An act that left many unanswered questions and further incited anger within the community.

To paint Mark Duggan as a complete angel would be naïve. He was the focus of an undercover trident operation and this suggests that he was unlikely to have just been someone in the wrong place at the wrong time. However the issue with this case is that as the story progresses we are beginning to uncover discrepancies within the story we were first told. Such as the fact that we now know the bullet found in the police officers radio was a police issued bullet, therefore it is highly unlikely that Duggan did shoot at police.

This begs the question of whether he really did shoot at the police and even if he actually had a gun in the first place. All this and more needs to be addressed by our London met but unfortunately the violence and criminality that has spread around the UK has made it easier for the force to sweep these matters under the carpet as our community and government focus on how to deal with these rioters.

The protest began peacefully outside Tottenham police station. Family and friends of Mark Duggan gathered outside wanting answers regarding the circumstances surrounding his death. Tensions rose when police vans pulled up and the family were left waiting outside for 5 hrs before being spoken to. As night fell a 16 year old girl allegedly walked up to a group of police and asked why they had killed Mark Duggan. She apparently threw stones at them and her placard; in turn the police hit her with a baton, knocking her to the ground. This Resulted in the crowd attacking the police and turning on their community. The outcome of that day in Tottenham has produced devastating effects throughout the country.

Within days the rioting spread throughout London, creating a feeling of fear and helplessness amongst Londoners. The issues surrounding Mark Duggan were forgotten and instead an interest in obtaining new trainers, TV’s and tracksuits prevailed. London boroughs have been heavily damaged with many left homeless or jobless, as the mob mentality of the rioters have caused them to attack independent businesses and the homes of people in their own community. From London the rioting then spread across the country even as far as Bristol. When questioning the rioters about what had provoked them, few had anything to say other than blaming their background and the government. Others when spoken to off camera just said they wanted “free things” or “Mark Duggan who?”.

However the previous image of teenage youths being the only rioters is currently being blown out of the water, with a primary school worker and a millionaire’s daughter being among the first looters to be fast tracked through the courts. Convicted rioters have been warned that they could lose their council houses, assuming that the only rioters were from backgrounds of poverty. Clearly that threat will do nothing to scare the millionaires’ daughter.

The main media also need to be careful about how they are portraying the riots. Publications such as the Daily Mail appear to be heavily obsessed with race in regards to the rioters. This is only helping to rile up nationalist groups who are now using the situation for their own agenda. This can be seen in the unrest that occurred in Eltham a few days ago and rumours of Mosques being highlighted for attack. As the rioting dies down the police and the people involved in the riots will have a lot to answer for. With whispers of insurance and taxes being hiked up and mumblings of curfews, lets hope the next step does not result in the innocent people of England having to also take the fall for this spell of confusion, ignorance and violence.

Facts about me: I am a Microsoft paint wizard

2011-08-16T22:45:00.002+01:00

SHHHHHHHHHH .....

2011-07-27T14:36:00.007+01:00

I am now on le contributer page for IDOL magazine. "But you're still not getting paid jade" neither is your madre. Anyway i'm happy, I wrote a mini biography in the THIRD person. Something I always relish in doing because it's like being the queen for a millisecond.

Here is a link to the page so you can see the biography that I wrote about myself. I didn't realise how hard it would be to sum yourself up into 100 words. But I managed to get my love of fast food into it so I think I did well.

CLICK!

Everyday interning

2011-07-24T20:28:00.015+01:00

I thought I would give you a little insight into one section of my world right now. The world of le internships. Also known as work experience, also whispered as slavery.

It's widely accepted that you must graft before you get to where you want to be, if you don't you have to either be extremely lucky or have a daddy who plays golf with the CEO of your chosen company. So far I'm not confident in my luck, I haven't ever won the lottery and my dad thinks golf is boring. But I guess if those fatties from Scotland who won £161 million on the euro millions applied for a job at Elle Magazine they'd get it, because currently that shit is just elusive to me.

[I'm writing this while listening to my So Solid Crew play list and I can't concentrate properly. Can one of you trendies put on an old skool garage night? Tankyoupliz]

I don't particularly have any horror stories to tell you. Only mild stuff like being sent to John Lewis to get specific bin bags for one of the features writers. I've been sent to someones house to pick up their suitcase, I've had BORING times where I've ended up hiding in the fashion cupboard, doing Roley poly's in there (I will never be a lady of the world with her pinky out).

The stereotypes of the majority of internships going to the Hettie's, Lexie's and Molly's of the world is not a lie. Last year I took on a week internship at a really big magazine (it's pinky is always out). I won't say the name because I'm paranoid but just know they called me up about 2 days before I was due to start so I had to clear my entire schedule (Judge Judy re-runs. No I did actually have shit to do that week).

It also meant I would start the internship on my 22nd BIRTHDAY but I still ran forward to the opportunity with open arms. So basically it was that badman magazine on roads.

And let me tell you

I was surrounded by them SW "My names Binty yaaah" type London girls. They were nice enough, HOWEVER we all started off in the fashion cupboard but it turned out that I had been placed there by accident, I was actually supposed to be at a desk so already I was segregated, everyday Jim Crow. Then on one of the days I walked into the cupboard and heard the tail end of "it's just we don't have much in common with her" ...maybe it wasn't about me but I also know they used to go for drinks after work and I was not invited #FOREVERALONE. Anyway that place, as fancy pants as it was, ducked and dodged my queries about the expenses they said they would cover and in the end they didn't pay me. This is where the slavery part comes in.

We are apparently in a 'recession' most places do not have the budget to take on new staff, most places are letting people go so in turn a lot of places seem to have this constant 'intern' role. It's usually a role where you do the job of someone who would actually get paid a salary except they just don't pay you or they have the right to pay you some meagre wage. The long term placements usually entice you in under the pretence of a mythical job being offered later on.... next thing your last day comes ... and the day after you're unemployed. Because in actual fact these places probably knew they wouldn't take you on from the day you walked in. Interns seem to be a lot more easier than keeping someone on. Especially if it's in an industry where people are constantly willing to work for free. Don't hate le playa hate le game I guess.

So right now I'm stuck in limbo. Or purgatory but I don't even know anymore if I would consider this idolised office job at 'MatNags' as my heaven. The placement I'm at right now it seems a lot of fun but the staff on the mags that have been around for a while seem to be brain dead. More and more I don't associate these magazines with writing and having my dream job, in my mind I start to smell stale coffee, tea, and microwave meals (because no one actually leaves their desks for lunch). Small talk about gym visits before they came to work. And I don't think they would let me put my So Solid Crew play list on the communal radio.

I have dreams to go and work abroad, maybe my brain thinks I'll be able to escape the mundanity I'm currently witnessing but truthfully it's all probably the same thing but with a different accent.

But that's enough of my 21st century woes.

I was in Paris the weekend before last

2011-06-29T21:53:00.009+01:00

My butthead took me for my birthday and it was a lorrrt of fun. Paris has always been the only other city I would consider living in forever (besides London) and this trip reaffirmed that for me again! Here are a few of the pictures, not all because uploading pictures on blogspot is such a ball ache. The pictures are also not in a coherent order but strap in for the raahd anyway.

We've both been to Paris before and done loads of touristy things so we strolled around a bit and did a few different things that we hadn't done before. We managed dinner on the Seine, a tour of Paris on the Seine, a Fafi exhibition, an 80's graffiti exhibition, a BMX bike riding competition, we went to see Sacre Couer, ate a lot of food, walked around Monmarche a lot and a few other things. Sighhh, tek meh bark.

So i'm currently interning with IDOL Magazine

2011-06-29T21:42:00.003+01:00

Here is a review I did about a new Ron English exhibition

Click

LUDA

2011-06-24T17:47:00.007+01:00

Currently listening to some old school Ludacris having a jolly good time.

Must.. not.... itch... face.

2011-06-24T17:01:00.014+01:00

So after a good few weeks my skin has flared up in a rash, it's a rash I have come to know quite well over the past year. Allow me to explain, last year around this time my face went from normal to what is known as 'problem skin' it happened gradually and as I didn't take the necessary precautions I should have, it got worser and worser and WORSER (and worser) until I felt like the only way I could leave my house was with make up on (which obviously and ironically is apart of the problem)

In the past I had never had issues with my skin, even during teenage years I may have got the odd spot or whatever but nothing to complain about and during uni years my skin was just perfect, literally the day after I turned 22 my skin decided that it wanted to be the boss of it's own destiny. So since then i've tried a lot of different products ranging from the cheap stuff you get in 'Boots' to the brands that like to get fancy and make you feel like they'll change your life.

Nothing seemed to be working until recently, as in a few months ago I remembered two separate conversations i'd had with two friends who have glowing smooth skin. I asked them what they used and one replied "Nothing, just water. Sometimes that brand called Simple" ... O_O

The other friend basically said the same thing "Nothing just water or soap"

Thats when your brain wants to call them wenches but I decided that-

Sorry to change the subject abruptly but I just went outside because the ICE CREAM VAN STOPPED OUTSIDE THE HOUSE. RIGHT OUTSIDE, THIS HARDLY EVER HAPPENS! So I got my money and ran out then I looked in the car window at my reflection and did sad face because this rash is attrocious. Then I turned around just as my sister ran out and she looked dead in my face and said "ergh". SO.

Anyway I decided I would calm down what I was doing and only use water and soap, I KNOW SOAP, the devil of all cleaning products cause it dries out your skin! But this shit is working for me. Also my friend has started making body butters and gave me a pot (i'm an honarary guinea pig) and it's very rich so any normal person wouldn't put much on their face but as i'm using soap every now and again I use a liiiitle bit extra than necessary on my face and I think it's balancing out the lack of moisture you'd otherwise have.

I've also started drinking this Dr Stuarts skin purify tea. And basically a week after that my mum commented on how different my skin looked. I'm not saying but i'm just saying.

The dream team
Oh the tub of sodium whats it called and Glycolic acid is something I haven't used yet. It takes a lot of work to use it properly and quite frankly i'm too lazy at the mo, but it helps to heal blemishes.

Back to the matter at hand *Dr dre voice* so this rash. It started yesterday and came up in full force this morning and what had I done a few days before? Used a bloody Dermalogica cleanser. I started using this brand during the truely crap days of my skin and this is basically the rash that would come up, I don't know why I decided to get cocky and put it on just when my skin was feeling funky fresh but there you are. The wisdom of Jade. Moral of the story is nothing is promised!!

"but it's just your skin Jade"

This will take about a week to go down 0_0 and so I just wanted to tell you all and Dermalogica to suck it.

Hello Snitches and Witches

2011-05-18T06:13:00.001+01:00

Guess who passed their driving test...

Me! Happy is not the word! I promise not to gloat or to drive past you non driving humans with the wind in my hair. I will not do this. And if I do, what will you do about it? Nothing because I will be speeding past you, leaving dust in my wake and and angry open mouthed you. joooorrrrrsssssKIDDIN. Ok it's out of my system.

Aw I am happy it's over though, after my compulsory education and then UNI this was the only thing in my head that seemed to be the LAAAST TEST. But now i'm free!

EDIT

This is such an old post but i'll put it up anyway! This is all the way from early may but has been sat in my drafts since then. But yes I am a proper driver now, I haven't knocked down anyone on my travels, fingers crossed I can continue to live my life with that talent under my belt.

New Goodies

2011-05-13T18:03:00.008+01:00

Hello losers I did a bit of online shoping a couple of nights ago when my brain strategically forgot that May was going to be a "No buying new clothes month". One of the few things I bought was a underwizz-ear set from the brand 'Made By Niki'. I stumbled upon the website through ANOTHER blog which I also stumbled upon whilst searching for something else that I cannot even remember anymore and on a whim I decided to buy!

The designs are ridiculously cute, plus PLUS plus (and this is basically the main reason why I bought this set) right now a few of their pieces are being sold for £10 when usually most of their prices are £60 and up. Sorry, but a bargain is a bargain i'm sure my bank balance will turn a blind eye.

Mainstream

2011-05-12T17:19:00.000+01:00

Another one for my adoring camel toe public

2011-05-05T15:09:00.004+01:00

GPOY

2011-05-03T18:57:00.004+01:00

I am actually trying to take this blog a bit more seriously and I have a few blog posts in the pipe line that are not particularly self centered. Or just a picture. or just a music video. I plan on actually writing (what!? no way) more stuff like this, so that will hopefully start happening in the next few days and i'll actually start advertising le blog too. GULP. But for now here is a picture (fail) that is centered around self (fail 2). I hope you enjoy my heart eyes.

If you're interested, my Camel Toe post is still going strong attracting serious views daily, hello pervs! Can we do like Lady CaCa and i'll be your 'Mother perv' and you can be my 'Little Pervs' and i'll pretend to love you but all I really want iz yo monays (views).

Wiley - Numbers in action

2011-05-03T16:21:00.002+01:00

A new song from Wiley, I like it and I like the concept for the video. It's simple but effective.

Also is it just me or has Wileys face changed, it's like he's ageing backwards. I'm not complaining, I would have never thought i'd ever describe wiley as cute... well it is 2012 next year so I guess anything goes.

2011-04-25T23:21:00.000+01:00

Chillin out maxin relaxing all cool

2011-04-25T22:39:00.002+01:00

I'm not gonna post the end product yet because it's going to be altered a liddle bit. But this was my sunday. I ended up tanning through my lace pull ups so now I have the lace pattern on my thighs, epic win.

Shy Fx Feat uk Apachi - Original Nuttah

2011-04-25T20:32:00.001+01:00

Benny Benassi - Put Your Hands Up

2011-04-20T22:20:00.001+01:00

A comment under the video: "my neighbours love this song so much so they call police mens to listen this too"

Picture vomit

2011-04-20T19:12:00.021+01:00

I'm always taking pictures on my phone and they never go anywhere, well here is a whole bunch from late last year up till now. Uploaded especially for your viewing pleasure. Right now according to my stats I get the majority of views from my Camel Toe post, at anytime someone is ALWAYS looking at it. So basically I have a load of pervs on my site. It's not exactly the clientele I was going for but I'm basically getting a couple hundred views a week because of a guy with a vagina penis, who am I to complain? Sorry I always go off topic. Basically the point is the only people who may even chance upon this post are looking for pictures of shapely genitals and I always aim to disappoint. So here ya go!

10 year warranty on breast implants *sign of the times*

Sotch a face - took this pic from a magazine

Sleeping beauty awakes ("it'sa .... nor me")

Toilets in pub

"Life is your playground"

juxtaposition

When my family got the delivery of all their furniture from Brunei

This said merry christmas but now we change the writing so we don't get bad luck (its still up)

"THAT'S.RA.CIST!"

on the way to eastbourne, COWS

lilys sisters face intrigued me

"Relationship Wizardry" lol wizardry

drawn by leidiot

Rome!

Hair shoot

what a FLATTERING PICTURE, *side eye evening standard* That's Alexandra Burke and not a drag queen

Definitely an "oh you fancy huh" moment, even the nonchalant curved pinky. Really jade?

Much better.

London trains

In one crap quontum dress that was on the sale rack in a shop in Carnaby.

Valentines day

This song is too intense & the music vid is AMAZE.

2011-04-19T22:25:00.008+01:00

Firstly: BASSSSSS. Secondly: 4:10 - 4:17 and THIRDLY: I want to be a dj. I'll do a club night and play this song on repeat for the whole night, anyone who complains gets thrown out and the last person standing gets a gift. A link to this youtube video. *Vogues*

(Also can you spot swizz beatz)

Space

2011-04-19T22:08:00.003+01:00

Another ridiculously good album. Melody AM.

Count your blessings

2011-04-19T22:06:00.002+01:00

"& give thanks to the master, that through all the disaster, we're still here together after. Better count your blessing"

Such a good album

Coachella

2011-04-18T16:59:00.010+01:00

Like most, i'm hating on the people who are currently at Coachella, the line up and the weather looks amazing. I had always kind of ignored Coachella up until last year during the summer when I did work experience with ASOS magazine and one of my first jobs was to find hotels for the editorial team to stay at while they went to Coachella (insert sarcastic comment here about how much writing you actually do on an internship with a magazine).

Asos were actually really nice to work with AND they gave me a leaving gift, most places don't give you jackshit. I'll leave the gripes and stories for my 'woes of an intern' blog which i'll no doubt post sooner or later.

ANYWAY COACHELLA. So while looking for the hotels I realised ..."fuck yeah coachella'' just like that. The heat, the setting and the music it's like a more beautiful Glastonbury, (while we're on the subject of Glastonbury, BEYONCE WHY?) and I realised I would have to go atleast once in my life. When they announced the lineup earlier this year I seriously felt like putting on some spandex and perspex sumtings and working 'hard for mah moneh' to pay for the flight and hotel over there. Didn't work out.

So here I am googling Coachella street style, torturing myself a liddle bit. Here are my favs:

Snaps are from here, here, here and here

Hello

2011-04-18T13:07:00.002+01:00

GOODBYE

Saturday night, getting down and dirty

2011-04-16T22:32:00.014+01:00

with -____________- cheesy pop music Exhibit A:

(Standardly listening on repeat with me gusta face, what's wrong avec moi?)

Applying to Jobs and hearing through my headphones the sound of my grandparents laughing hysterically at Jackie Chan in 'Who am I'.

The woeful life of a desperado graduate (with forever optimistic eyes despite David Camerons apparent 'enemy of progress' gene.)

NEW LOWS MY FRIENDS. NEW. LOWS.
____________________________
EDIT: To date my 'Camel Toe' post has recieved 213 page views, it's my highest viewed blog post. The world is such a place of intense wizardry.

Dear MySpace

2011-04-14T15:10:00.003+01:00

How can you try to gain users by turning into a combination of all of your competitors? Why would I come to myspace to get facebook and twitter done badly. The whole layout of myspace is confusing and ugly. One of the best things about myspace was that it had a basic design that we could edit ourselves, now we have all these new ideas HANDED to us without choice. It is now one of the most infuriating websites to go on! Just now I went on there with my nostalgic eye hoping to read some old comments and they've fucked it up! The website is just a ball of fucked, TOM, WHAT HAVE YOU DONE! Edit: I clicked a link that said 'view all comments' and was taken to a photo page lmao wtf

I changed the banner

2011-04-12T21:48:00.001+01:00

that counts as a blog post. so does this.

Today around East London

2011-04-10T23:41:00.005+01:00

Had a reaaally lovely day today just walking around in the sun, then stopped at a pub for a beh-ver-arge and sat on the benches outside. This was taken as we were walking by le canal. Then walked to 'The breakfast club'around 3pm and had pancakes, maple cyrup, the BEST crispy bacon ever, scrambled eggs and these cut up potatoe wedgies. Like the fat bitches we are, was delicious.

Another music post

2011-04-09T18:09:00.006+01:00

This time some jazz, mostly brazilian *drool* You can basically thank my dad for this post, these songs remind me of being young. I actually bought tickets today for my dad to see tania maria for his birthday! Tres exciiioted. If you want more let meh know

Black Coffee

2011-04-08T17:46:00.003+01:00

Black Coffee is a BOSS from south africa. Big boss DJ. - End of biography -

Now i'll let his music do le talking, if you understand BASS. Press play.

THIS. THIS. Is the first song I ever heard from Black Coffee a few years ago. It is intense.

Another gorgeous track, the lyrics are tres nice.

This ones a nice one to chill out to, love the bass

Love the womans voice in this one and the end it features the song çome to me'(the 3rd vid I posted)

The dancing in the vid is too much. Wait for the fat guy with the cigar and rolling hips just gerring down.

His music was made for the sun and good vibes and all that good corny stuff. I only decided a few days ago to hunt through his discography and i'll deffo be playing his stuff through le summer.

This morning

2011-04-07T23:04:00.012+01:00

Before I got out of bed I found myself trying to remember the exact lyrics for khias song 'my neck, my back' I spent a good few minutes starting the song from the beginning thinking it would help my brain to subconsciously dredge up the lyrics ("Awl my ladies pap yo pooseh like this") but it didn't work. So somewhere God is being Godly making sure that Khia lyrics kindly vamoose back to where they came from after their sell by date.

I got up, then went and did some top secret shit with my friend, (not really, but i'm still not telling you what we did) then I came home and went shopping avec ma mere. I've got to say le high st shopping game right now is DIRE. Topshop is working the bold colours trend and when you initially step in le visual merchandising kind of makes you go:

Then you take a closer look and you just realise "pshhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh" O_O The same goes with every other store, the clothes are so dry. We went into primark and I did obligatory buying because I have no self-restraint and I just see £5(!!) and go:

And end up spending waaaaaaayyy waaaaaaay over what could be considered a bargain. ...Everyone needs a bag though. And daisy duke shorts ...and other stuff though so i'll view this as an investment (that gets ripped to shreds in the first wash). Here are some pics of the stuff I bought for your enjoyment and general life fulfillment:

Camel Toe

2011-04-07T22:55:00.005+01:00

Thinking about wearing this tomorrow for my friends birthday thingy at this chav bar place.

Scared of this happening:

Yes imagine the whole outfit turned into a bright orange jumpsuit. I couldn't ever in life pull that off. I don't know. I kind of hate the whole leather look leggings with sheer button shirt, it makes me feel like Coleen Rooney but I can't be bothered with anything else in my wardrobe at the moment, PLUS. It's so comfy, if I ever got a 'food baby' or 'alcohol baby' no one would ever have to know!

Some kano for your playdo

2011-04-07T00:16:00.003+01:00

it'slikenobodydon't dance no more *matrix dance moves*

Oh margie, you came and you gave me a turkey. On my va-ca-tion away from workie

2011-04-07T00:02:00.007+01:00

Title has nothing to do with this post, that lyric was just in my head and if you know where it's from and the episode, you are truely loved. By moi. Sorry for lack of postage yesterday, I know my captive audience were truely devastated *tumbleweed*. Anyway I was busy being busy yesterday and had no in'er'net access that's why I didn't post anything. But she'sssssssssssss baaaaaaark. Now. and still with nothing particularly relevant to say. I like the sound of my own typing too much. I'm going to make sure le next post will have something readible in it with stuff that you can apply to your own life. Rather than family pictures and rambling emo posts that should really get deleted. Welp here are two picturs of me at work on Tuesday

(I'm wearing a black maxi skirt)

This video counts as my diary post of le day

2011-04-04T22:12:00.006+01:00

yeaaaah ... i'm being lazy by not writing anything. Shake your ass though, enjoy this poetry and mind your business. While I mind mine, because yesterday/today I think I decided I might become an enterpreneur, you can all thank me later too. “Hey girl, you’re mighty fine let me make you, all mine you. look. like. you’re hipster omg do you have a sister? omg do you read the fader? shake your ass, thank me later Mad decent, fools gold omghe’s such a hoe DIPLO!”

Marseille

2011-04-03T21:31:00.002+01:00

lol he is "putting me up" while he's over there, just gonna lie and say I did them ^_^ "Oh when were you in Marseille jade?" -___- the same time your mum was there.

Abroad

2011-04-03T21:11:00.007+01:00

I want to go abroad and work, I want to get away. I'm starting to feel so restricted I don't feel like i'm letting myself be great and i'm constantly letting other peoples views of me shape how I view what I do and how GOOD I am at what I do. I'm annoyed at myself for ALLOWING others to start to mold me into what THEIR perception of me is, it's getting so frustrating. SO SO frustrating. I feel like I need to maybe let a little 'give a fuck?' (within reason)into my life.

Only writing this

2011-04-03T00:35:00.008+01:00

Because yesterday I promised that I would write a diary entry every day. I am too fass. Sotch proclamations. Argh. SO today I went to work, was working avec one of le girls, was nice. Day went pretty well then I came home, my sis was over from uni and so was my cousin. ... I walked into my room and they were both sitting comfy in there, my cuz even had the audacity to be wearing my black lipstick that I got at the black hair shop for £1.95 NOH RESPECk. Well i'm sleepy, i'm on my sisters laptop, she's left it in my room. Woo hoo wireless baby. I just read a blog post of some 19 year old girl complaining about being 20 and i'm officially hating. Fuck her. Do you know i'm going to be 23 this year? It's true fuck me too because 23 is not old, but still. When I was younger I was feeling like a superstar and now my spotlight seems to be fading. Ok thats dry. I showed my cousin a few vids from OFWGKTA at first she was O_o then she was ^_^ they really do have that affect don't they. I want to change my hair, however I saw a picture of some girl with my little pony hair and she officially killed my desire to own it. I'm going to go to sleep before this post turns emo and self centerdy. Also i'm going to go to bed before I txt my idiot, cause I want to be the cool gf who's bf goes on holiday and she don't even give a fock cause she's got a life outside of him. YOR LIOFE H'IZ A FA-SARD. Anywho i'm so fucking cool, I gats this shit. Old picture that I found on my sisters laptop, it's of the elephant (and his self made grass hat) that used to live round le corner from my fam when they were in Brunei. As much as I missed them when they were over there (I couldn't go live out there cause it was crucial tymz of uNi), now I miss them not being over there. Lawd please remind me of this when I start to complain about everyday shit, cause that is basically an explanation for most things I think are worthy of my complaining.

Hallo Thar

2011-04-02T00:23:00.008+01:00

Wellar, hai. Ok so I have seriously neglected this blog, I think it's because in my head I had plans to turn it into somewhere where I post essays and so i'm putting it off because it seems like ReAlLy HaRd WeRk. It's not really but I have a blog on tumblr and tumblr as a blog is the equivalent of twitter. As in you don't really write much and when you do you basically sum it up in one paragraph. One sentence is preferably better (and written in the title part so its bold and looks good). Anyway to ease myself back into writing, PROPERLY. As in atleast TWO paragraphs, i'm going to start using this as a diary, everyday writing something about my day and hopefully in doing that i'll actually start writing about things that don't affect moi at all, or more opinion type posts like this opiniontypeposthurr . Le sigh. So what did I do today. I went to work, was doing stuff for the website, like writing descriptions for the stock and looking up twitter things for the new twitter page. It was very quiet, not many shoppers it's really frustrating how the foot fall is ... falling. Considering we're like slap bang in the middle of two of londons major shopping areas. Hopefully it'll improve a bit more during le summer. My guy is in france, hopefully not getting up to too much trouble and I miss him (yeah I know you just did the throw up sound, even my own brain did the throw up sound) but yeah h'is true so ... C'EST LA VIE AND SUCK MAH BAWLS. My cousin just scwwang bah at 12am in the night/morn and she has a new car. She got it today O_O she went to the dealers with her dad with the intention of just looking around and ended up trading in the car she drove there in to get a brand new one .... can I past my test please? *one lone person coughs in the background* Le car is nice, I have a car. It's a bit of a banger but I really like it so I just need to past this blasted test then I can put my middle finger up at the dvla and get on the road. I'm currently re-reading this:

Sotch an epic book. I got it in my teenage years so it's a good few years old and HAGGARD. Some of the pages are falling out, infact they have fallen out but they've just been shoved back in and are being held there with hope and air. If you have never read the book please read it, I wish it was a play or a movie so a wider audience could experience it. I really really recommend it. Recently i've read two Nick Hornby books, i've never read his books before and he's good, got to admit. He still doesn't match up with my magnificent four though: Ben Elton, Zadie Smith, Douglas Coupland, Jonathan kellerman (yes I am a loser). However back in the day my go to people for good books were: Jacqueline Wilson, Malorie Blackman, Benjamin Zephaniah and a little later on Cecily Von Ziegesar aka the writer of the gossip girl books. Guaranteed if you ever read the series you would hate the show no lie.

Well i've sufficiently babbled and my eyebags want to be growing eyebags so bai.

Burnin' Rubber

2011-03-23T22:35:00.000Z

Sneeze

2011-03-22T23:51:00.002Z

Old School Tuesday

2011-03-22T22:32:00.004Z

I don't think this eminem would have done a duet with rihanna. To me the eminem nowadays looks braindead. He's just like: "give me money bitches" O_O and then when he's made enough he's gonna crawl back to his cave and lock le doors. Same avec britney spears. Don't know if you've noticed but there is NO.THING. going on behind those eyes of hers. Not ah tiiiing.

Dj Jazzy Jeff X Mick Boogie - Summertime The Mixtape

2011-03-14T23:05:00.007Z

The best shit EVURR.

TRACKLIST:
* 1. Summertime Intro
* 2. Kool & The Gang: Summer Madness (Live Version)
* 3. Kool & The Gang: Summer Madness
* 4. Quincy Jones: Summer In The City
* 5. Ahmad: Back In The Day
* 6. Ice Cube: It Was A Good Day
* 7. Roy Ayers f/ Mary J Blige: Everybody Loves The Sunshine
* 8. Pharcyde: Passin’ Me By (Ffej Remix)
* 9. Jay-Z f/ Babyface: Sunshine
* 10. Ramsey Lewis: Sun Goddess
* 11. A Tribe Called Quest: Find A Way (Ffej String Edit)
* 12: Bush Babies f/ Mos Def: The Love Song
* 13. Jodeci: Get On Up
* 14. The Commodores: High On Sunshine
* 15. J Dilla f/ Dwele : Think Twice
* 16. Erick Sermon f/ Marvin Gaye: Music (Mick’s Marvapella Edit)
* 17. Bernard Wright: Who Do You Love
* 18. LL Cool J: Loungin’
* 19. A Tribe Called Quest: Hot Sex
* 20. Main Source: Live At The BBQ
* 21. Nuyorican Soul: Nautilus
* 22. Pharcyde & Sublime: Summertime
* 23. Fresh Prince and Jazzy Jeff: Summertime Remix
* 24. Michael Jackson: I Can’t Help It
* 25. De La Soul: Breakdawn
* 26. Musiq: Just Friends
* 27. Carl Thomas: Summer Rain
* 28. Faze-O: Riding High
* 29. Dionne Warwick: Walk On By
* 30. Skee-Lo: I Wish
* 31. Black Moon: Who Got The Props
* 32. Frankie Beverly and Maze: Before I Let Go
* 33. Nu Shooz: I Can’t Wait
* 34. Montell Jordan: This Is How We Do It
* 35: The Roots f/ George Benson: Breezin’
* 36: Fresh Prince and Jazzy Jeff: Time To Chill
* 37. Biggie: Can’t You See
* 38. James Brown: The Payback
* 39. En Vogue: My Lovin’
* 40. Bobby McFerrin: Sunshine Of My Life
* 41. Fifth Dimension: Let The Sun Shine In
* 42. Mos Def: Sunshine
* 43. Nine: Whatcha Want
* 44. Otis Redding: Sittin’ On The Dock
* 45. 2Pac: I Get Around (Mick’s String Edit)
* 46. Zapp: Computer Love (Terry’s Mirage On The Water Mix)
* 47. Seals And Croft: Summer Breeze
* 48. Jay-Z: Dear Summer
* 49. Weldon Irvine: Morning Sunrise

Listen to the whole thing on soundcloud here

Edit 7/4/11: Seeing as I keep getting hits from people who are clearly looking for the download link here ya go : LINK! x